Hubby & Studdy Bears

I just got these via e-mail and had to post them to the Blog.


ONE
Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could
have an order of 6,9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.
I asked for a half dozen nuggets.
"We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at thecounter.
"You don't?" I replied."
"We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.
"So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?"
"That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.
_____
TWO
The paragraph above doesn't amaze me because of what happened a
couple of months ago. I was checking out at the local Foodland with
just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the beltclose to mine.
I picked up one of those "Dividers" that they keep by the cash
register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed.
After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the
"Divider" looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.
Not finding the bar code she said to me," Do you know how much thisis?"
I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy thattoday."
She said "OK" and I paid her for the things and left.
She had no clue to what had just happened.
_____
THREE
A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive
and pulling it out very quickly. When inquired as to what she was
doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking
for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."
_____
FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do
you need some help?" I asked.
She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery to this
remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they
(pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit
this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm too?" I asked. "No, just
this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me.
As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied," Why
don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a longwalk."
_____
FIVE
Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day
she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of
typing paper. What do I do?"
"Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that,
the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.
_____
SIX
I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was
towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of
repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in Twister."
I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver
had set the "cruise control" and then went in the back to make a
sandwich.
_____
SEVEN
My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office
of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have
problems with their computers.
One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who
had this question:
"I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys
have a fire downtown?"
_____
EIGHT
Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a
metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy
machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police
pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't
telling the truth.
Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.